I'd Rather be a prostitute - Sabrina Fisicaro's story

Longtime local escort, porn producer, porn star and author Sabrina Fisicaro, 36, wants you to get to know her better.

She has written an autobiography, La Femme au cent prenoms (IQ Groupie 2004) and is now working on more detailed English-language life story that she hopes to complete this year.

She’s also appeared in over 100 hours of footage for an upcoming documentary about her life called I’d Rather be a Prostitute, directed by Mia Donovan.

Since 17 the St. Leonard native has changed personas almost as often as her fishnets. She became Nina for two years in such places as Peurto Rico, then Angel in Pennsylvania, then she became Toni in Ontario for four and then Alex back here in Quebec. For a while she had a muscular short-haired Brigitte Neilsen look finally became Lexei Bacci, a pornalicious video vixen.

One reason she has nothing to hide is that says she declared every cent of her income and paid all her taxes throughout.

Sabrina now shuns the flash that once captivated her.

“I dematerialized about two years ago. Before that, I had to have a new car every six months and it had to be a convertible. I enjoyed comfort but also realized that it attracted a lot of unwanted attention and for me it just was not worth it. I got rid of most of my material possessions and now live the simplest life possible and will probably do that for the rest of my life.”

Sabrina has long shunned intimacy, not only has she never been married or had kids, but she’s never been keen on boyfriends, another thing she’s thinking of changing. “Last time I had someone that I could say that was significant in my life was in December 1994 and that’s why I ended it – for many years there was a self-sabotage. I never thought I’d commit myself. When I’m committed it’s 100 percent if I’m a prostitute I’m 100 percent that. I thought if a guy would not mind what I did, I wouldn’t want him as my boyfriend or husband. I have to admit that I’ve been maybe more open to a relationship but not at any cost I respect myself and I treat men like kings.”

She’s been inspired to write her new book and participate in a movie because those who read the first one left with a lot of questions. “People read it and wanted to know more, 'Why did you choose this?' 'How did you live it?' and 'How did you become the person that you are today?'. All of this wasn’t explored, so I’m in the process of writing a second book, that will cover more extensively why I got into it, it’ll cover my childhood, where I come from and it’ll definitely be much deeper like what exactly happened to me."

“There was sexual physical and emotional abuse, beatings on a daily basis on me and my brother. It’s not something I mentioned in my first book. I had never let any one into this personal stuff, not even a psychiatrist knows what I’m saying it’s the first time I admit this.”

“I’ve protected many people that aren’t worth protecting and now I’m not doing that. I won't necessarily name names but they’ll be easily found."

She says it’s all about enlightening and instructing, not recrimination. “Without those challenges I wouldn’t be the human being I am today. I guess we all choose our path.”

She’s a bookworm and digs films, her latest favourite being New York Doll. “It’s about the bassist of the New York Dolls and his journey to becoming a Mormon, after three of the original members died. It shows the human side of a person. Until then you only saw the image.”

Sabrina warns others against the unseen land mines on the path to fast skin trade cash. “I’m basically the mother who says 'don’t get abused, don’t get manipulated. This is what not to do.' I’m all safe sex. I don’t take chances on anything and the way I’ve run my business, whether I was producing porn or escorting, it was without drugs or alcohol. I feel sad for those who have to use drugs and alcohol, not only in the sex industry but in any job.”

Sabrina trades no sex these days. "I did all that in the first part of my life. Now I just want to transmit. Maybe people can save themselves a lot of trouble and heartache if they can learn from my story.”