Louis Armstrong used to come to Montreal alla da time in the 50s. He was an earthy guy and Montreal loved him. Satchmo adored porno mags and loved to show his favourites around to those he met. He also loved to have a high quality bowel movement. Armstrong held many-a-conversation from his round-seated throne where he'd discuss the merits of his favourite magazines and laxatives.
Like her boss Jean Charest who lives up on the hill on Victoria Avenue, newly elected Liberal first-timer Kathleen Weil is a Westmounter. And to many folkses' surprise, she was immediately named to the cabinet - (good thing she chose the right gender!) in spite of having no political experitence. She is well known to her Stayner Park neighbours because she doesn't like curtains and you can see inside her house. Weil has been billed as an anglo even though her mom is a francophone and she sends her kids to posh French private school in Outremont. So she's not only an anglo, but she's a good anglo. Coolopolis wishes her solid judgment.
Snow tires. The provincial oppressors have, as we know, enacted a ridiculous law forcing motorists to pay $500 or so on equipping their cars with these things. Other media support this law. Other media have a ton of ads from car tire places. We applaud George Iny for opposing this needless draconia. Coolopolis predicts that helmets in cars will be manadatory next. But if the provincial government insists on coming up with another ridiculous rule, we propose they ban the act that has threanted many a happy male motorist including Morgan Freeman whose recent vehicular mishap in Mississippi suitably required him to be saved by the Jaws of Life. It's not safe to drive while being orally pleasured by a woman (doubly dangerous when it's not your wife) and it can lead to a serious accident, although if you've got to have an accident I guess this might be the way to go. Drivin' Miss Daisy indeed!
Like her boss Jean Charest who lives up on the hill on Victoria Avenue, newly elected Liberal first-timer Kathleen Weil is a Westmounter. And to many folkses' surprise, she was immediately named to the cabinet - (good thing she chose the right gender!) in spite of having no political experitence. She is well known to her Stayner Park neighbours because she doesn't like curtains and you can see inside her house. Weil has been billed as an anglo even though her mom is a francophone and she sends her kids to posh French private school in Outremont. So she's not only an anglo, but she's a good anglo. Coolopolis wishes her solid judgment.
Snow tires. The provincial oppressors have, as we know, enacted a ridiculous law forcing motorists to pay $500 or so on equipping their cars with these things. Other media support this law. Other media have a ton of ads from car tire places. We applaud George Iny for opposing this needless draconia. Coolopolis predicts that helmets in cars will be manadatory next. But if the provincial government insists on coming up with another ridiculous rule, we propose they ban the act that has threanted many a happy male motorist including Morgan Freeman whose recent vehicular mishap in Mississippi suitably required him to be saved by the Jaws of Life. It's not safe to drive while being orally pleasured by a woman (doubly dangerous when it's not your wife) and it can lead to a serious accident, although if you've got to have an accident I guess this might be the way to go. Drivin' Miss Daisy indeed!
"we propose they ban the act that has threanted many a happy male motorist, sometimes known as the Morgan Freeman syndrome. It's not safe to drive while being orally pleasured by a woman"
ReplyDeleteYou mean this is legal?... Why is this the first I am hearing about it?
Time to re-read The World According to Garp.
ReplyDelete