Pied for slammin' fembots

He (sort of) died for free speech. No wonder you never heard of him.
   Over a six-hour period in the waning days of 1977, 20-year-old journalist Roy Cooper took more than 50 violently-hurled cream pies to the face while restrained in a public stockade.
   And his crime? He had "mocked feminists!" And their reprisal? Cooper was "kidnapped" and locked into a restraining torture device for all of the world to witness.
   Mr. Cooper, whose survival (indeed his very existence) has thus far been unascertained, underwent an uninterrupted barrage of unholy things, such as abuse -- how would you like strange-hatted broads pelting you for more than six hours straight? (Um, how much? - Chimples) Or public humiliation? (Um, how much? - Chimples)
  Hennyway, feminista Elinor Simpson declared that Cooper would be just one of many to submit to such treatment in the future.

   "Our decision to humiliate a man in public ... will be followed by many others," said the eye-shadowless she.
  Simpson went on (Don't they always? - Chimples): "We have a leadership role in society. There is no way that we will abandon it."