Ah..Montreal in springtime!
It's that time of year when we all go downtown to peruse alluring items, as preparation to know what to grab after those windows are smashed during the next riot caused by the Canadiens winning a playoff game.
Meanwhile Montreal isle has a mellow feel, surely interrupted only by only-in-Montreal moments where bus drivers call the police against people who address them in English. That news story might sound crazy but I suffered a comparable experience a few weeks ago at the government booze shop on Sherbrooke West in NDG. The young male cashier, before ringing up my vodka, whiskey and rum, greeted me with a loud "Bonjour comment allez vous aujourdhui!?" I prefer a more gentle and flexible approach so I just looked at my shoes.
I get shoegazerish at times. Hey, I never promised to chit chat with cashiers. So he tilts his head, leans forward and repeats it or a similar variation. But y'know, I just don't have conversatin' on my agenda.
My cashier then steps back, performs a little exaggerated pantomime of surprise at my impenetrability and asks, "mais ca va monsieur?" I just really want to pay for the booze without verbal intercourse. In fact I didn't say a single word or make a gesture of any sort throughout this exchange. At this point the other male cashier looks over and asks his colleague whether all is alright and whether he needs to call security. Luckily he didn't but the threat was made. Speak when a provincial government booze retail bureaucrat speaks to you or risk getting dragged out. I finally got out safely without compromising my devotion to golden silence. The booze went down well.
Here then is the quiz of the day: What is this? Answer: yes it is a man's wig or toupee in a YMCA locker as seen this afternoon.
Here then is the quiz of the day: What is this? Answer: yes it is a man's wig or toupee in a YMCA locker as seen this afternoon.
shit, so thats where my toupe went.
ReplyDeleteToo dark for Dave Van Horne's toupee...perhaps it's Robert Vairo's?
ReplyDeleteI have no idea about the quiz. But I must say, I've been served by so many sour pussed, impolite, freaks, that I welcome the pleasant change, in the rare cases that it happens.
ReplyDeleteBut that's just me. :-)
Nice that you were able to keep silent. Hilarious that they considered calling security...sheesh.
ReplyDeleteI'm pretty sure the photo is Jacques Parizeau's hairpiece.
a toupee in a ymca locker i would say.
ReplyDeleteAnd the booze will make you more verbose, I assume?
ReplyDeletevairo has a weave. i've seen him checking it in the mirror.
ReplyDeleteI still wish I could use the men's locker room and not have to deal with the screaming toddlers and annoying mothers.
It's a mullet, having a nap.
ReplyDeletePeabody
Also, let's not forget - let's *not* forget, Dude - that keeping wildlife, an amphibious rodent, for uh, domestic, you know, within the city - that aint legal either.
ReplyDeleteIn the '70s, my dad took me to the downtown Y. Nude swimming was allowed in the indoor pool back then. Is it still? Looking back, it seems odd. Also, I reached up to get something at the top of a locker, and the whole row of lockers fell towards me, pinning me to a bench.
ReplyDelete